Getting Lost

Don't ask me what I was doing there but I found myself in a very large military installation some time ago - it was nighttime, close to 10 pm. I don't know how it happened but I got lost trying to get out to the civilian side. Due to the time of day (night), there was little traffic on the fort's streets. After about thirty minutes of going to and fro and getting completely disoriented, I decided I would have to plan a strategy if I wanted to get out before running out of gas. I could have called someone but that would have been too embarrassing. Instead, I parked at an intersection and left my emergency blinkers on. Sure enough, after a while, a car passed by and stopped at the stop light where I was parked. I quickly jumped out of my car and without appearing too nervous, I told the soldier that I couldn't find my way out. He was very polite and told me exactly how to get to the nearest exit. You guessed it - I was a mere four blocks away from the exit but I am certain I would never have found it on my own. That's what happens when you don't know your way around. 

Eye gouging for IDIOTS

On an absolutely gorgeous day, I am reminded of the story of a poor music consumer. A man bought a Chinese violin (with case and bow included) for $32.75. The violin arrived but was not set up - basically, the bridge had not been set in place nor calibrated. He took it to a local shop to have it taken care of and was told it would run him $79.00 to have this done, plus TAX, of course. He then asked if they could also TUNE the violin, whereupon they said they would be glad to tune the instrument for him but he would need to pay an additional $39.00 for that - plus tax. He would owe them about $127.00 for the service he required and they could not offer him a discount because he was not a regular customer.